Well, it's Monday and I've either got a cold or hay fever. Considering it's that windy time of the year here, I'm thinking hay fever. Anyways, it sucks.

I do often wonder if I'll ever get back to within cooee of my sexy weight. I mean, even though I know I'm about 35 kgs overweight, I'm kind of comfy here,  you know? I wonder if I really really want to work hard enough to lose this, or the alternative which is to either 1. stay around this weight, or 2. get fatter. I was thinking a while ago that if I did get fatter I'd be eligible for a lap band. Now, I didn't think I'd ever think that was an alternative for me. Not saying anything is wrong with them, as I know it's as much hard work to lose weight with one as without....but the thought did cross my mind.

I guess in a way I AM sick of being this weight. I just want the Weight Loss Fairy to visit me overnight and wave her magic wand. Am I inherently lazy? I don't think so, I just can't see any reward in putting in the hard yakka. Will losing the 35-ish kilos make me a better person? Possibly. Will I like myself more? Not likely, as I pretty much like myself just now, well, the "inside" me, not the "outside" one so much. Will it make my gorgeous OH love me more? Well, probably quite a lot in the physical sense, but I dunno about the restI guess he does want to be proud of me. Damn it, I want him to be as proud to be with me as I am to be with him.

Anyways, Zumba tonight. A good excuse to dance like a complete idiot and have fun at the same time. It's about as much fun as you can have standing up. lol.